The Girl Dreamer

didnt quite had a good start for october..OCTOBER1 :(( first is another fight..my parents werent able to hold their emotions and blurted it all out again..sick and tired of these! next, they left me alone in the house..ran towards the phone to answer a call, suddenly saw myslelf on the floor..cant seem to move my left leg..IT WAS SO SCARY! everytime i tried to stand up, it just felt too heavy, i cant move it! i didnt know why, til now! :( im just scared that it might happen again, who knows, in school or in the bus! that'd be too much of a hassle..what is happening with me! :((

next, parents went to the doctor..mama's high blood and so as papa..papa also had high blood sugar so doctor gave medications..too many tablets to take each day..what is too expensive! hay, better than not do anything about it..became the house's nurse..24/7 duty..

october 3, mama had some kind of a mild stroke..we were up like around 4am because she began crying..she couldnt move her hands and she had a hard time breathing..good thing papa did some first aid treatment..i was so nervous and worried that i didnt know what to do!! :(( i cant actually believe that that happened..one thing positive about this happening is that mama and papa kind of regained their love and respect for each other,..atleast as to what i have observed..i hope they'll continue to love and support each other..i wouldnt want them quarreling about anything..its good that they're treating each other better than before and i hope it'll be like this forever..

school! its selling time for me! oh no, hope i reach the quota in time for the evaluation..

mader is mader and i love her! i will not be able to do anything about that! period.

PRAYER:
Lord, of course i want you to please please please give my parents good health and long life..i wouldnt be able to live normally without them..keep them strong please..take away their sickness and pain..let them love each other deeper to be able to enhance that happy factor inside them..i know you're there to help us solve things..i also pray that you may continue helping me with my studies..i dont care about my health, its all up to you..i promise i wont hold back, i will let go! if you need me already, just go! no worries! it'd be better for me to go first..i'd prefer that! so please, i hope you do understand!

>>>seventeen