The Girl Dreamer

Thursday, December 27, 2007

super surprises..=)

december 8, 2007

`one..

"mommy (12/8/2007 10:41:42 AM): hi anak!
mommy (12/8/2007 10:41:58 AM): may secreto akong sasabihin sa iyo sa jaunuary bago malaman ng ibang tao
mommy (12/8/2007 10:42:06 AM): secret i mean
mommy (12/8/2007 10:42:26 AM): feeling ko kailangan mong malaman dahil mahalaga ka sa akin"

*hindi ko akalain na mahalaga pala ako kay mommy..buong akala ko, wala lang ako sa kanya, pero hindi pala..ganun na pala
kabigat ung importance ko sa kanya..super surprised..*

december 12, 2007

`two

"birthday ni mommy and hindi na nya napigilan na sabihin sa SF 05-06 yung secret..aalis na cya next school year..i hugged her
nung kaming dalawa nalang and that hug was a very memorable hug..kasi yun yung hug ko sa kanya na super sincere and with
feelings.."

*sabi ko na nga ba eh, iiwan na nya ko..naramdaman ko na yun nung dec08..nung cnabi nya na mahalaga ako sa kanya..halata na
ino-all out na nya yung feelings nya..kasi nga aalis na cya..*

`three

"umiyak si mommy dismissal time..tinext ko at tinanong kung bakit..nagkaron daw ng problem sa present SF nya..sinabi nya
sakin hinanakit nya kasi isinusumbat daw nung mga bata yung handa for her..nasaktan cya..nasaktan din ako..d ko alam gagawin
ko kaya sinabi ko kay jenn at pau since SF 05-06 naman sila..we called her and kinomfort namin cya.."

*masaya ako na pinagkatiwalaan ako ni mommy..pero mali ata na inextend ko kayna pau at jenn ung info..nasira ko ata yung
privacy ni mommy..nasira ko ata tiwala nya sakin..pero kasi, hindi ko na alam gagawin ko eh..sana maintindihan nya..*

december 13, 2007

`four

"im not like the rain that just pours on you and then goes..im more like the air, sometimes keepin' quiet but is always
there..constantly hangin' around..=) -ms madz"

*nagulat lang ako na bigla cyang nagtext after a long time..yung quote pa means something..its not just some quotes na
sinesend nya before..parang may ipinapahiwatig.ay ewan..nasurprise ako..*

`five

"naospital pala si mader..tummy problem daw..kinamusta ko at sinabi na get well soon..hindi na ako sanay na itext cya pero
ginawa ko kasi concerned ako sa kanya..nagreply naman cya at matino naman yung reply..sinabi nya na salamat daw sa care and
concern..naaappreciate daw nya, tapos nag good luck para sa tests tom.."

*masaya ako na nagtext cya ng matino after ilang months..hindi ko ineexpect na bigla nalang nga cyang nagtext..hay..ano kaya
nakain nya..ewan ko ba..d nalang talga ako sanay pero masaya ako..at ok naman..*

december 14, 2007

`six

"i'll see you soon..wed early am is good, coz of corz i got u a special sumthing..so get it from me ok? nytie sweetie..tsup!
-ms madz"

*simula nung naging cold cya sakin, hindi nako nag expect ng kahit ano mula sa kanya kaya overwhelmed ako na may gift pa pala
cya sakin for christmas..masaya na malungkot..happy na nalilito..iniisip ko lang kasi, simula nung nag christmas season,
tsaka lang cya uli nagtext sakin at naging sweet..parang iniisip ko na kaialngan ba may occassion para maging ok kami..hay
pero cyempre..happy pa rin naman..*

december 17, 2007

`seven

"ms. jim :) (12/17/2007 1:10:08 PM): hi tin
ms. jim :) (12/17/2007 1:10:48 PM): i'm sori but d ako pwede sa 21. til dec 19 na lang ako sa alabng. i have to go to tarlac
sa 20 b4 i go home to bacolod sa 22
ms. jim :) (12/17/2007 1:11:03 PM): miss you so much. ingat ka lagi ha. i love you tin"

*masaya ako na cya lagi yung nangunguna at nagkukusa na sabihin yun 'i love you'..kahit ilang months lang kami nagkakilala,
napalapit na ng sobra ang loob ko sa kanya..magkikita kami sa 19..*

december 19, 2007

`eight

"christmas party..nakita ko silang lahat..and i got to have a picture with each one of them..tapos nandun din si ate nancy
with baby aaron..ms madz gave me her gift..una namin cyang pinuntahan and she hugged me so tight tapos cnabi nya na nandun si
ate sa loob ng faculty kaya pumasok ako to see her..nagusap lang kami saglit and told her na sa january ko na bigay yung gift
since i didnt know that they were coming..then pumunta na kay ms navida..nagkunwari pang umiiyak dahil sa pagkatouched tapos
tawa tawa..then kay mommy..medyo sad si mommy pero d ko alam kung tungkol pa rin dun sa thing.."

*masaya ako and super ocerwhelmed to have seen all of them in one day..super complete yung day ko..napakasaya ko
talaga..hinug pa ko ni mader after ilang months na naging cold cya sakin..nagulat din ako na nandun sina ate at
aaron..surprised talga sobra..kinakabahan nga lang ako sa lagay ni mommy pero naramdaman ko naman na sincere yung hug nya
sakin..meron lang talga bumabagabag sa kanya..*

`nine


"we went to town mga 6.30-8pm to meet ms jim..reunion daw pero konti lang kami..kami lang nina joane, justine, janelle, karen
at ako..nag drop by lang cna anne, pedro, at mel..dinner lang kami sa tempura.."

*sa reunion with ms jim, masaya..ang dami nga nyang dala eh kaya kakaawa..pero masaya ako to have seen her..super happy..i
gave her the letter and our gift to her..masaya din cya to see us..sobrang nakakatuwa na makita cya ulit..*

`ten

"my sweet tin! I read ur very heart-warming letter..without checking out the gift ha! il open it sa 24 pa! btw, tnx agen!
things are d same btwn us,its just that we dnt c much of each odr anymore. no worries! ul always be my sweet tin! luv u!
tsup! -ms madz"

*after how many months, cleared na ang lahat..we're finally ok and i hope that this will last forever..im happy na tinawag na
ulit nya ako na sweet tin..back to normal na nga toh..saya..*

december 20, 2007

`eleven

"From: Jim
Date: 12/20/2007 4:03 pm
Subject: I'll miss you
Message:

Hi Tin, thank you very much for the time, the dinner and most of all the letter that made me cry again.
Don't worry, saan man ako mapunta, TIN, my little sister will always be in my heart. Merry Christmas tin.
I love you.

Always,
Ate Jim"

*so what can i say..napaiyak ko siya sa letter ko..and huwaw..call her ate jim? consider me her little sister? one of the
biggest surprise toh..wala akong kinalaman dito..i mean, siya yung nauna..ewan..overwhelmed..shocked..surprised.. mixed
emotions tagla..super d ko ineexpect..super nalolost ako..ate jim??? whew!!! pressure toh dude..pero naaappreciate ko..*

december 21, 2007

`twelve

"we went to zobel para ibigay gift ni natie for mader..sinundo lang ako ni natie sa harap ng village..we stayed there for
medyo matgal din and we were able to bond with her again after a long time.."

*masaya..super saya na after ng maraming months, eto ulit kami at nagbobond..namiss ko yung mga ganitong moments..tagal ko
ding hinintay na magkaroon ulit kami ng ganung bonding and i am happy na ngyari nga toh..super happy..*

`thirteen

" ms madz: hi ms liesel
ms samson: hi ms..(pause na nakatingin samin) baby ko yan ah, pinagpalit nako..hahaha..
ako: i missed you, i miss you na.."

*wow..kamusta naman yung isa pang sorpresa na yun..kala ko ba nakalimutan na nya ko..everytime nakikita nya ko sa corridors,
wala lang sa kanya tapos ngaun aangkinin nya ko??? labo ah..nagulat ako sobra pero naappreciate ko rin yun..kahit papano
naman, may pinagsamahan kami..haaayy*

`fourteen

"Date: 12/21/2007 3:05 pm
Subject: Re: I'll miss you
Message:

Tin, from now on, i will be your ate jim, tita jim hahaha. whatever you prefer. d na ako ms jim ha.
Ingat ka lagi. uwi na ako bacolod 2mrw. boat lang ako kasi wala ng plane.
I miss na my family so much
God bless you Tin.

Always,
Ate Jim"

*kamusta ang pag insist na wag ko na cya tawaging ms jim..hay..pressure talga..iba yung feeling na cya yung nauuna, na siya
yung nagiinsist..nasanay kasi ako kayna ate nanz, mader at mommy na ako yung nageeffort at nauuna sa lahat..ako yung
nagbibuild up nung relationship pero eto iba eh..cya yung may gusto ng lahat..cya yung nageeffort, naaappreciate ko, masaya
ako pero napepressure ako kasi baka mag expect cya ng todo from me..na baka hindi ako makalive up sa mga expectations nya
sakin..oh no..pero flaterred tlaga ako, promise..ate jim, masaya ako sa ginagawa mo..=)*

PRAYER:
wow God, thanks sa lahat ng mga toh..super sumaya ako sa mga super surprises nyo..thank you talga..you're an extra ordinary God tlaga..love you PAPA GOD..=)

>>>seventeen

posted by tin17 at 3:30 PM 0 comments

Thursday, December 20, 2007

CHORVA DAY =)

19december2007

hello hello hello..wala lang..happy birthday to my dear friend jenny u. :) wala lang..i am uber happy..u know why? because i have completed all my loves today..i was able to be with my friends and ofcourse with my special loves - ate nancy, mader, mommy, and ms jim..plus pinuntahan din namin si ms navida..hahaha..i got to have pictures with all of them na..thanks to my beautiful friend ria!!! yehey..i am so happy and hyper..i also did not expect that im gonna be this happy..it's just so fulfilling that after all the heartaches that iv gone through, il still have those short but meaningful moments with them..OMG talga..i cant believe that it all happened..hehehe..

plus, i really did not have any clue that my ate nancy will be coming..i did not expect that im going to see baby aaron..he's wearing the superman tshirt i gave him..awwww...so sweet..i love him..and ofcourse, i love her mom..hehe..he's so cute..such a very cute angel..hehehe..


and also, my mader hugged me like crazy..sweetie pie honey pie..awwww..i missed that..


also ms navida acted that she was crying..chorva lang pala..ahaha..we laughed a lot.. =))

but i dont know what to say to what i saw when we went to mommy's clasrum..she was just right beside the door while all of her students we're having fun inside the clasrum..i just hope that she's ok with them already..but i am also happy because i was able to hug and kiss her..love her so much..hehehe..

anyway, just want to let you know that i did not eat sa school..i only ate a single stick of bbq and it was not even from our class..it was from srD..hehe..that's why after karen and i distributed all our gifts, we got so tired and didnt notice that its time already so we were really so hungry when we left school..hehe..good thing it's jenny's birthday, she treated us sa giligan's island and i ate literally A LOT!!! that was my first time to eat so much in a restaurant..crazy me..hahaha..after that, we went to natio and gift gate to buy a frame for ms jim's picture coz we're going to see her 6.30pm..excited me..hahaha..so after we bought that stand that says 'i love you' on it, we(eunice, karen and me) decided to go to eunice's house and rest for awyl..we left jenny with her boys(nic, mark, consing and kev)..we rested there in eunice's room, laid down and watched grey's anatomy..i dont really watch that but owel..we also talked about some stuff..chikka chikka..hehe..after around 2hours, jenny followed us there and then at aroung 5pm, we went to karen's house to get the picture..we went back to town and we had the picture laminated..then we went around, went up to go to the fudcourt and met with july, klar and jenn..we talked for a moment, and then they went ahead already..6.30 we went down to tempura and checked if srE and ms jim's already there..but they're not there yet..they arrived around 7pm..we ate at tempura..bonded with ms jim..stayed there until 8pm..and finally went home..=)

what a day..so tiring but it went really well..happy day..=)

CHORVA DAY!!!

PRAYER:
thank you so much papa GOD..i am so happy..thank you thank u thank u..i dont want to exchange this day for anything..its one of the best in my entire life..was able to complete what i wanted..love you papa GOD..super thank you..=)

>>>seventeen

posted by tin17 at 8:58 AM 0 comments

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

ate, mommy

kinakabahan ako..dahil sa secret na sinabi ni mommy..sa january pa nya sasabihin..tsaka kasi dahil sa surprise for her tom..oh no tlaga

pero masaya ako kasi nakita ko na si BABY ZOE!!! ang bagong baby ni ate..its a girl..i love it..huwaw..=)






PRAYER:
Papa God, alagaan nyo po sila ate at baby at mommy ah..tsaka ung iba pa..please kayo na bahala basta mahal ko sila..=)

>>>seventeen
posted by tin17 at 9:55 AM 0 comments

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

hindi ko maintindihan..

12/04/07 - tuesday
hindi ko na talaga maintindihan ang sarili ko..in the first place, hindi ko alam kung bakit ko sila minahal ng ganito..bakit ko minahal ang mga piling teachers ko ng ganito???? bakit sila? bakit sa kanila ako kumukuha ng pagmamahal, inspirasyon at lakas??? bakit ba kasi sa kanila??? i cant understand and i cant explain...kasi nalilito ako..hindi ko maintindihan talga kung bakit ba kailangang sa kanila ako humugot ng lakas..pede namang sa pamilya ko, or sa mga kaibigan ko..eh bakit mas gusto ko sa kanila? bakit sila yung mga taong pinaka gusto ko makasama??? bakit ba??? may makakasagot ba ng tanong na yun??? kasi hindi ko talga maexplain eh..kasi hindi ko talga alam ang sagot..i am confused.. naiinis ako sa sarili ko na kinakailangan ko pa sila para mabuhay..bakit hindi ako makontento sa mga kaibigan ko?? bakit sa kanila ako mas nakakapag enjoy at nakakapag open up?? hindi ko talga maintindihan..naiinis ako kasi kung iisipin mo, wala sanang hassle ngaun sa buhay ko kung hindi ko naman sila minahal ng ganito..kung wala sila sa buhay ko, wala akong mga problema ngaun..wala sana akong mga bagay na pinoproblema..hindi sana ako umiiyak everyday, every night..hindi sana ako nasasaktan..hindi sana ako napapahiya..hindi ko sana nafifeel na useless ako..hindi ko sana nafifeel na kinalimutan ako..hindi ko sana sinisisi ang sarili ko ngaun sa lahat ng lungkot na nararamdaman ko..hindi sana ako nagmumukmok..hindi sana ako nagboblog ngaun tungkol dito..hindi sana ako naguguluhan ngaun..hindi siguro ako naiinis palagi..hindi ko sana maiisip na ang sama sama kong tao..hindi sana ako nahihirapan..pero i have to accept all these kasi mahal ko sila at inaccept ko sila sa buhay ko kaya kailangan kong panindigan toh..

ate, mahal naman kita eh..kaso hindi ko lang maintindihan kung bakit minsan, parang ramdam ko na may mali..na parang ayaw sakin ni kuya nhes..na parang minsan naiirita ka na sakin..hindi ko tuloy alam kung kailangan ko pang ipagpatuloy toh..promise ate mahal kita, kaso hindi rin kasi natin makeep ung communication eh..tapos naka leave ka pa ngaun..so hindi ko talga alam kung pano na gagawin ang lahat..hindi kita matext, hindi ka nagrereply sa emails at sa multiply..kaya hindi ko na talga alam kung pano kikilos, kung pano didiskarte..hindi ko alam kung pano pa ko makikipagcommunicate sau pero ginawa ko tlaga lahat ng paraan, tinry ko pa kontakin si kuya nhes pero wala talga..pero promise, di mawawala lahat ng memories, lahat
ng care at love ko sau..you will always be my ate nancy and il always be your little sister..

ms madz, sorry...alam kong nasaktan kita..pero promise, hindi ko talga sinasadya na maparamdam ko sau yun..sa totoo lang, nasaktan ako na inisip mo na parang in purpose ko yun ginawa..kasi dba sabi ko naman sau, di ko naman talga magagawa yun..kasi nga ikaw yung isang taong PINAKANAKAKAKILALA sakin..walang halong biro, sobrang love kita dahil dun..kasi ikaw lang yung taong nasasabihan ko straight forward ng mga problems ko at nasasabihan ko ng thoughts ko about anything..ikaw yung gumabay sakin since grade seven and kahit inaamin ko na mas mahal ko si ate, feeling ko mas importante ka sakin kaysa sa kanya, kasi ikaw, active ka sa life ko..alam mo lahat..mas kilala mo ang tunay na ako..you've been there for me kahit sa
saddest or happiest moments ko at tinuring na kita na second mom ko..sobrang i cant afford to lose you..sana mabalik yung dati..sana maayos natin lahat ms madz kasi ayokong matapos lang ang lahat ng ganito..ill always be here for you no matter what..remember that..

mommy, ikaw yung taong mahal ko pero hidni ako kilala ng lubos..pero wala akong pakialam kahit ganun..mahal kita at walang makakapagbago nun..maraming times napansin mo or nahulaan mo or sadyang alam mo lang na may problema ako..tinulungan mo ko nung mga times na yun..tinry na pasayahin ako kahit deep inside me mahirap..pinangingiti mo ko kahit na ayaw
ko..naaappreciate ko yung mga yun..thank you kasi lagi kang concerned sakin..laging nandyan ang helping hands mo..hindi mo ko iniwan..you make me feel loved and you make me feel that im special..im happy na nakilala kita..hindi ko lang alam kung bakit iniisip ko ngaun na wala ka nang paki sakin..maybe because you told me na susulatan mo ko para matulungan sa latest probs ko pero hindi mo nagawa..hindi kita masisisi..mahal parin kita..busy ka lang kaya cguro hindi mo nagawa..ok lang..

ms jim, how amazing na you made me feel special with your gestures sa short time lang..kala ko ang koneksyon natin ay adviser lang kita tapos magkabirthday lang tau pero hindi pala dun nagtatapos ang lahat..ms jim mahal kita kasi ikaw yung taong sincere..ung taong sinasabi lahat ng nararamdaman..thank you ms jim kasi dumating ka sa buhay ko and ipinaramdam mo sakin na
kahit magkahiwalay na ang dalawang tao, walang problema basta nagtitiwala sa isat isa na mananatili yung communication at yung love..thank you ms jim kasi marami akong natutunan sau..sobrang ikaw yung tumulong sakin na muling tumayo at lumaban sa buhay..ikaw yung nagturo sakin kung pano maachieve yung tunay na happiness..ikaw yung taong pinahalagahan ako dahil sa mga munting bagay na nagawa ko for you and i love you for that ms jim..masaya ako na nakilala kita..hinding hindi kita makakalimutan..kahit pumunta ka na sa bacolod, you'll always stay in my heart ms jim..sobrang salamat sa lahat..

PRAYER:
kaw na po bahala samin GOD..thy will be done..

>>>seventeen
posted by tin17 at 7:15 PM 1 comments