The Girl Dreamer
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
Reco ng SF today...
haha..la lang..today was such a fine day..our reco was such a success and i can't believe that i was able to survive it..it was so much fun and i want to repeat it again..cyempre, as usual, i cried so hard nanaman..i never had a reco or retreat naman ata na i didn't cried..wahaha..super saya ko sa mga activities namin, super nakakatuwa and exciting..i got to bond with my class, with ms kyra, ms geriz, ate erika, kuya paul and cyempre ang aming ever dearest adviser ms rogador.. alam ko na kahit papano, this reco made us closer to each other..masaya ako kc kahit papano mas nakilala na namin ang isat isa..yun nga, medyo mas naging ok na rin ako kay ms rogador kc nga dahil dito sa reco na toh kaya mas ok na ang buhay ko..haha..wala lang..well, basta ang high light nitong recong toh ay umiyak ako..haha..=)
uhmmm, pero meron parin deep inside me na medyo sad and lonely..this reco kasi also made me realize na sobrang namimiss ko na c "ate" ko..as in sobra..although i know na again, medyo nagiging bonded na kami, sa email nga lang, meron parin sa loob ko na gusto na makita cya at makausap personally..mas lalo ko pa cya namimiss tuwing naiisip ko na mag lileave na cya ng mga august..arghhh..bad3p..pero masaya ako na mas lalo nga kaming nagiging bonded kahit sa email lang at mas marami na kaming nasheshare na mga bagay bagay tungkol sa isat isa..
Prayer for today and tomorrow:
God, thanks po talga kanina..nakasama at nakausap ko nanaman kayo ng matino, nabigyan nanaman ako ng pagkakataon na makilala kau ng mas mabuti..salamat po sa lahat ng mga biyaya at sana'y di kayo magsawa sa pagbigay ng mga ito..salamat din at binigyan niyo ko ng pagkakataon na makarealize ng mga bagay bagay dahil dun sa reco na yun..salamat po talga..para naman po bukas, sana po ay maging masaya at successful ulit ang araw ko..sana ay matupad ko ang mga hiling ko para sa sarili ko..sana ay makagawa ako ng mabuti bukas at sana po ay mali ang inaakala ko na galit c mader..wahehe..basta po alagaan nyo ang lahat ng mga mahal ko sa buhay..kayo na pong bahala sa kanilang lahat..mahal na mahal ko po kayo Diyos ko..maraming salamat po talga sa lahat..=) Amen.
uhmmm, pero meron parin deep inside me na medyo sad and lonely..this reco kasi also made me realize na sobrang namimiss ko na c "ate" ko..as in sobra..although i know na again, medyo nagiging bonded na kami, sa email nga lang, meron parin sa loob ko na gusto na makita cya at makausap personally..mas lalo ko pa cya namimiss tuwing naiisip ko na mag lileave na cya ng mga august..arghhh..bad3p..pero masaya ako na mas lalo nga kaming nagiging bonded kahit sa email lang at mas marami na kaming nasheshare na mga bagay bagay tungkol sa isat isa..
Prayer for today and tomorrow:
God, thanks po talga kanina..nakasama at nakausap ko nanaman kayo ng matino, nabigyan nanaman ako ng pagkakataon na makilala kau ng mas mabuti..salamat po sa lahat ng mga biyaya at sana'y di kayo magsawa sa pagbigay ng mga ito..salamat din at binigyan niyo ko ng pagkakataon na makarealize ng mga bagay bagay dahil dun sa reco na yun..salamat po talga..para naman po bukas, sana po ay maging masaya at successful ulit ang araw ko..sana ay matupad ko ang mga hiling ko para sa sarili ko..sana ay makagawa ako ng mabuti bukas at sana po ay mali ang inaakala ko na galit c mader..wahehe..basta po alagaan nyo ang lahat ng mga mahal ko sa buhay..kayo na pong bahala sa kanilang lahat..mahal na mahal ko po kayo Diyos ko..maraming salamat po talga sa lahat..=) Amen.
>>>seventeen
Monday, July 18, 2005
medyo sad..
Sad kasi kakaiba yung feeling, bigla nalang akong umiyak habang nagchachat..hindi ko alam kung bakit pero simula chem time pa ko ganito..yung parang kanina pa gustong sumabog yung puso ko at ilabas lahat ng nasa loob..ang labo nga eh, kaya ngaun, eto, sumabog na nga..blast out sa pamamagitan ng luha..kakaiba talga ung feeling, hindi cya normal, kaya nung dismissal, i decided to go to mader para kahit papano ay mapawi ang kalungkutang nararamdaman ko, pero she was doing lotsa stuff sa comp niya kaya i just left nalang after seeing her so busy..ok na yun kc kahit papano nakita ko cya, kahit papano ay nakabawas ng sakit at bigat na nadarama..ewan ko ba, ang labo talga ng feeling..ang dalas dalas kong nagkakaganito..pero ok narin kasi this feeling lets me think of my loved ones more often..ewan ko kc when im malungkot, bigla nalang nag sisink in sa mind ko na nandiyan sila for me and stuff..basta ganun..and also, i wasn't able to see my "ate" today but i know that eventually, sooner or later, we will have a chance to talk and i just have to wait for that moment to come..i just have to be patient with all these stuff..
Prayer for my day tom:
God, let my day tom be a successful one, may it be in terms of other people or in terms of my studies..let me be responsible enough to do my tasks and lead my other friends to a better life.. may i be able to accomplish my jobs for tom and may all my loved ones be at peace and unity forever..may i be able to answer my tests contineuosly and i hope that i will not hesitate in answering the questions, i ask for your guidance as i take my tests tom..God, tom is going to be a very crucial and exhausting day but i know that you're there to guide me so pls dont leave my side..I trust you and i will remain faithful to you forever..If ever ill encounter problems, expect me to come to you and tell you about this and ask for help, also, i promise not to forget to visit you every morning..God, thanks for everything and i hope that you'll never let me down..
In Jesus name we pray, Amen.
>>>seventeen
Sunday, July 17, 2005
realizations...
Like in my last post, i've told you guys that since i became 15 yrs old, i was able to realize so many stuff..not just about love, studies and friends, but also about life itself..This past months, weeks and days, i was able to realize that i regret the times that i said i want to die already..i just think that the world is really for me to explore so i have to live more and do it than just die and know nothing about my world..It's just that, i started appreciating my life and all the things around me that i really want to know more about them so how could i do that if im going to die early..so now, i promise that i will really try my best not to think about dying and leaving this world, but instead to continue my life and to live it well until im still here and alive with full of blessings and people to be with..i just thank God that He gave me another new day to live so that i can share what i have and i can use my capabilities to do good things..i want to thank Him, because this past few days, He gave me so many reasons for me to love my life more and to give big importance about it..i really feel so blessed for all the things i have and for all the happenings that i am experiencing..even my problems, im thankful for them coz i know that without them, i wouldn't be able to learn to be strong and to fight back the tears that hinders me from doing my best..i know that these problems and difficulties will help me live my life better than before coz i know that it will teach me good lessons that will stay in my heart and mind forever..i thank God for giving me such wonderful people in my life to be my companion to go in this journey He gave me, to help me with the trials i'll face and to be with me in times of sorrow and despair..i just really feel so blessed with all of these things and happenings in my life and i am really thankful that i have what i have right now..no more, no less..=)
Prayer for people:
Family - that we may be able to live life together and to avoid hurting each one, to be always at peace and to be always united in whatever undertakings we will experience, also to be one with God and to be under His care forever, to have His blessings and guidance for the rest of our lives.
Relatives - that we may be closer to each other so that the bond with each one will be tighter, so that we may be one in all things we do not only for other people, but also to praise and worship our heavenly Father.
"ate" - for her to be successful in all things especially about family matters, also for her to be always be happy and contented with her family and to stay close to God which i know will surely help her with everything, for a peaceful and united family to stay together forever until eternity, to always stay healthy and fit to do the things she needs to accomplish each day, for her to be always safe and protected by God's grace and to be showered on with many blessings all throughout their lives, also, to have a successful delivery of her first child.
mader - for her to achieve her goals and to have her wishes come true, also to be able to be successful in everything she'll do and that God will always guide and bless her in her journey here on earth and to always think possitive, that she may be able to solve her problems and trials that God has given her and for her to be always safe.
Friends - for us to be solid friends forever and for them to be always safe, for them to be guided by our Lord in all the things that they will go through, that they may be able to be contented with what they have and to try their best to do good things for God's greater joy and glory.
God, i lift up to you everything, we offer everything to you Lord for we know that you deserve all good things, please hear me with my prayers for my loved ones. May they be able to live their lives well and may they also be closer to You and realize things about their lives, please always guide them and don't let them go astray, i trust you God with everything and i promise that i will do all that i can to prevent myself and other people to do bad but instead, to do what is right and good. I thank you for everything and for whatever these people have done bad, i am the one saying sorry for them for i know that they just don't know what they are doing, i also say sorry to you for all th bad things i've done since you raised me up in this world, i promise, that from now on, i will really try my best to be closer to you and to avoid all those bad stuff around me so that I may be able to atleast show you that i really regret all my sins and that i am sincerely sorry and will really try to change. I believe in You, my Lord and my God and I will love You for You gave me this life for me to live and to experience the happiness of being human and having all these kind of blessings you're showering upon us.
Prayer for people:
Family - that we may be able to live life together and to avoid hurting each one, to be always at peace and to be always united in whatever undertakings we will experience, also to be one with God and to be under His care forever, to have His blessings and guidance for the rest of our lives.
Relatives - that we may be closer to each other so that the bond with each one will be tighter, so that we may be one in all things we do not only for other people, but also to praise and worship our heavenly Father.
"ate" - for her to be successful in all things especially about family matters, also for her to be always be happy and contented with her family and to stay close to God which i know will surely help her with everything, for a peaceful and united family to stay together forever until eternity, to always stay healthy and fit to do the things she needs to accomplish each day, for her to be always safe and protected by God's grace and to be showered on with many blessings all throughout their lives, also, to have a successful delivery of her first child.
mader - for her to achieve her goals and to have her wishes come true, also to be able to be successful in everything she'll do and that God will always guide and bless her in her journey here on earth and to always think possitive, that she may be able to solve her problems and trials that God has given her and for her to be always safe.
Friends - for us to be solid friends forever and for them to be always safe, for them to be guided by our Lord in all the things that they will go through, that they may be able to be contented with what they have and to try their best to do good things for God's greater joy and glory.
God, i lift up to you everything, we offer everything to you Lord for we know that you deserve all good things, please hear me with my prayers for my loved ones. May they be able to live their lives well and may they also be closer to You and realize things about their lives, please always guide them and don't let them go astray, i trust you God with everything and i promise that i will do all that i can to prevent myself and other people to do bad but instead, to do what is right and good. I thank you for everything and for whatever these people have done bad, i am the one saying sorry for them for i know that they just don't know what they are doing, i also say sorry to you for all th bad things i've done since you raised me up in this world, i promise, that from now on, i will really try my best to be closer to you and to avoid all those bad stuff around me so that I may be able to atleast show you that i really regret all my sins and that i am sincerely sorry and will really try to change. I believe in You, my Lord and my God and I will love You for You gave me this life for me to live and to experience the happiness of being human and having all these kind of blessings you're showering upon us.
In Jesus name we pray, Amen.
>>>seventeen
Saturday, July 16, 2005
successful end of the week..
alam nyo, sa totoo lang, hindi successful yung week ko..ang totoo ayoko talaga ng week na toh..kundi lang dahil sa nangyari kahapon..kc super daming tests, mahihirap pa..tapos lagi nalang ako nadedepress araw araw..cno ba nman ang matutuwa sa week na ganun..dba wala..except nalang kung may mangyari saung kakaiba..as in yung topic pa sa filipino tungkol sa love na parang lahat sa class apektado na natatahimik nalang pag tungkol dun ang dinidiscuss..haaay, kasi namn..ewan ko ba..basta super hassle at tiring ng week na toh..super hindi nako magkandaugaga sa mga pinag gagagawa ko..grabe talga..solid na kakaiba.. kung hindi nag email c "ate" walang kwenta talga ang week na toh..sobrang nagpapasalamat ako kay "ate" kc inalis nya lahat ng pagod ko dahil sa email na yun at sa mga cnabi nya dun lalo na yung line na, "kahit di tayo masyado nagkikita o di kita masyadong nakakausap o kaya naman minsan ma-feel mo na di kita pinapansin o napapansin, isipin mo pa rin na your my little sister.".. o diba ang saya at ang gaan gaan sa puso na tawagin kang little sister ng taong mahal mo at dati ay ikaw lang ang tumuturing sa kanya na kapatid, ngaun naman ay ipinapakita na nya sakin na itinuturing na rin nya ko na kapatid at iniinvolve na nya ko sa mga pangyayari sa buhay nya..mahal na mahal ko ang "ate" ko dahil dito sa pangyayaring ito..
Diyos ko, salamat po at inend nyo ang week ko ng maayos kahit na ang kabuuan nito ay kapaguran, salamat po at lagi nyo akong pinapakinggan at hindi binabale wala, ipinapangako ko po sa inyo na gagawin ko ang lahat para makabawi sa kabaitang ipinapamalas nyo sa akin at pati sa aking pamilya't mahal sa buhay..salamat po sa lahat ng mga biyaya..mahal na mahal ko po kayo Diyos ko..
nagpapasalamat din ako dahil inihanda na nga ako ni "ate" tungkol sa high school lofe at dati pa nya cnabi na dapat paghandaan ko na tong high school life at masanay nako sa madaming works..nagpapasalamat nga ako sa kanya kc kundi dahil sa mga bilin nya at advice, cguro hindi lang ganito ang mararamdaman ko ngaun..cguro magwawala nako sa sobrang inis at pagod kung hindi ako inihandsa ni "ate" tungkol sa mga bagay no toh..salamat talaga at andyan cya para suportahan ako at bigyan ako ng advice kahit na alam kong busy cya..nararamdaman ko yung importansiya ko sa buhay nya..sobrang iba talga cguro ang buhay ko kung hindi ako napalapit sa kanya at kung hindi ko cya nakilala..sobrang dami kong narerealize simula nang naging 15 years old ako..super parang nag mature ng sobra ang utak ko lalo na emotionally..narealize ko rin na hindi lang sobra kundi sobra sobra sobrang swerte ko na parte ng buhay ko c "ate" at parte rin ako ng buhay nya..cya na ang taong sobrang pinasasalamatan ko na dumating sa buhay ko at nagpakumpleto nito maliban sa pamilya't mga kamag-anak ko..hinding hindi ko na cya kayang alisin sa puso't isipan ko kahit anong mangyari..kahit pilitin pa ko ng kahit na sino ay hinding hindi ako papayag na mawala at maalis sa akin ang taong nagbigay sakin ng pag-asa at ng dahilan para mabuhay..
isa pang taong pinasasalamatan ko na dumating sa buhay ko ay c mader..ang totoo naman kc, cya lang ang tanging tao na nakahigit kay "ate" sa puso ko at alam kong mahirap mahigitan c "ate" pero nagdecide ang puso ko nung araw na yun na payagan c mader na higitan c "ate" nang hindi ko napipigilan..ibig sabihin, meron talagang rason kung bakit napasali c mader sa buhay ko kaya't gaya ni "ate"..mahal ko rin cya pero alam ng lahat na mas mahal ko parin si "ate".. kakaiba lang tong relationship ko with mader kc dati, sobrang hate ko cya nung hindi ko pa cya nakikilala ng mabuti but when i got to know her better, sobrang na-amaze ako sa napakagandang ugali nya..wala nakong masasabi pa and i know that she deserves to be loved by everyone..
itong dalawang taong binanggit ko ay dalawa sa mga taong napakaimportante sa buhay ko at hinding hindi ko kakayanin kung mawawala cla..gagawin ko ang lahat para sa kanila, para sa kaligayahan nila at sa ikabubuti ng kalagayan nila..i will never ever put them down and i will never ever give them up..hinding hindi at final decision ko na yun at wala nang makakapag pabago sa decision kong toh..Diyos ko, alagaan nyo po cla lagi lalo n po ang aking "ate" na malapit nang manganak..yun lang po..let me hav a wonderful week ahead of me..salamat po sa lahat..=)
>>>seventeen
Diyos ko, salamat po at inend nyo ang week ko ng maayos kahit na ang kabuuan nito ay kapaguran, salamat po at lagi nyo akong pinapakinggan at hindi binabale wala, ipinapangako ko po sa inyo na gagawin ko ang lahat para makabawi sa kabaitang ipinapamalas nyo sa akin at pati sa aking pamilya't mahal sa buhay..salamat po sa lahat ng mga biyaya..mahal na mahal ko po kayo Diyos ko..
nagpapasalamat din ako dahil inihanda na nga ako ni "ate" tungkol sa high school lofe at dati pa nya cnabi na dapat paghandaan ko na tong high school life at masanay nako sa madaming works..nagpapasalamat nga ako sa kanya kc kundi dahil sa mga bilin nya at advice, cguro hindi lang ganito ang mararamdaman ko ngaun..cguro magwawala nako sa sobrang inis at pagod kung hindi ako inihandsa ni "ate" tungkol sa mga bagay no toh..salamat talaga at andyan cya para suportahan ako at bigyan ako ng advice kahit na alam kong busy cya..nararamdaman ko yung importansiya ko sa buhay nya..sobrang iba talga cguro ang buhay ko kung hindi ako napalapit sa kanya at kung hindi ko cya nakilala..sobrang dami kong narerealize simula nang naging 15 years old ako..super parang nag mature ng sobra ang utak ko lalo na emotionally..narealize ko rin na hindi lang sobra kundi sobra sobra sobrang swerte ko na parte ng buhay ko c "ate" at parte rin ako ng buhay nya..cya na ang taong sobrang pinasasalamatan ko na dumating sa buhay ko at nagpakumpleto nito maliban sa pamilya't mga kamag-anak ko..hinding hindi ko na cya kayang alisin sa puso't isipan ko kahit anong mangyari..kahit pilitin pa ko ng kahit na sino ay hinding hindi ako papayag na mawala at maalis sa akin ang taong nagbigay sakin ng pag-asa at ng dahilan para mabuhay..
isa pang taong pinasasalamatan ko na dumating sa buhay ko ay c mader..ang totoo naman kc, cya lang ang tanging tao na nakahigit kay "ate" sa puso ko at alam kong mahirap mahigitan c "ate" pero nagdecide ang puso ko nung araw na yun na payagan c mader na higitan c "ate" nang hindi ko napipigilan..ibig sabihin, meron talagang rason kung bakit napasali c mader sa buhay ko kaya't gaya ni "ate"..mahal ko rin cya pero alam ng lahat na mas mahal ko parin si "ate".. kakaiba lang tong relationship ko with mader kc dati, sobrang hate ko cya nung hindi ko pa cya nakikilala ng mabuti but when i got to know her better, sobrang na-amaze ako sa napakagandang ugali nya..wala nakong masasabi pa and i know that she deserves to be loved by everyone..
itong dalawang taong binanggit ko ay dalawa sa mga taong napakaimportante sa buhay ko at hinding hindi ko kakayanin kung mawawala cla..gagawin ko ang lahat para sa kanila, para sa kaligayahan nila at sa ikabubuti ng kalagayan nila..i will never ever put them down and i will never ever give them up..hinding hindi at final decision ko na yun at wala nang makakapag pabago sa decision kong toh..Diyos ko, alagaan nyo po cla lagi lalo n po ang aking "ate" na malapit nang manganak..yun lang po..let me hav a wonderful week ahead of me..salamat po sa lahat..=)
>>>seventeen
Sunday, July 10, 2005
Week full of success..
Natapos na yung week ko..I am talking about July 4-8, 2005. it was a pleasant and successful week for me for I was able to accomplish 2 main things in my life..first, to be able to fix things up with mader and second, is to be able to atleast talk to "ate" more than a second..Naging napakasaya ng week ko kc lahat ng importanteng gawain ko sa buhay ay naayos ko na dun sa week na yon..cguro isa iyong biyayang panahon para sa akin at para sa ikauunlad ng buhay ko. Now, I can go on with my life now without hassles and hesitations about anything..super blessing came my way last week and im thankful and glad that I was able to be successful..Basta ngaun ayoko nang magkamali at magkulang..gusto ko lahat in smooth flow at kung meron mang problema ay dapat maayos ko agad..ayoko na kasing magpatagal ng problema..ngaun, as much as possible ayoko ng magtampo at magalit kay "ate" pati narin kay mader dahil narealize ko na clang dalawa pala yung main point ng buhay ko maliban sa pamilya ko at hindi ko makakaya ng wala sila kaya dapat ipreserve ko cla at hindi ko dapat hayaan na magkalayo kami kasi alam kong hindi ko yun kakayanin, although I know for a fact na pagtumanda na kami ay baka mag separate na kami ng landas pero as of now, i will keep the bond stronger to have intimate relationships with them..sana magpatuloy pa yung blessings na natatamo ko at sana hindi magsawa ang Diyos na patnubayan ako at ang mga mahal ko sa buhay..Yun lang po, at maraming salamat po Diyos ko sa lahat ng nangyari noong nakaraang linggo..
>>>seventeen
>>>seventeen
Friday, July 08, 2005
Supeeeeeeeeeerr Saya ko!!!
I am very very very extra ordinary happy today!!!!! I feel so lucky talga...Grabe, supeeerr grabe ang tuwa ko ngaung araw na toh..cguro kc i wasn't able to talk to her for so long and ngaun nalang ulit kami nagkausap ng lagpas 5 seconds..wehe..basta sobrang saya ko, promise walang halong biro ang kasiyahang nararamdaman ko ngaun..salamat po talaga God, salamat, maraming salamat po ng marami..so ganito, kukwento ko na, wala dapat makalimutan sa supeeer sayang day ko..
Kasi nung umaga, sa bahay, hassle kc late nako nakagising..so nagmamadali and stuff tapos hindi ko nanaman napatuyo yung hair ko...patay, buti nalng hindi ako nakita ni mader kundi sasabunutan nanaman nya ko..wehe..la lang..tapos yun nga, 7:20 na nandun palang kami sa may toyota..basta dun somewhere, alam nyo na yun..eh hindi ako sanay ng 7:30 dumadating sa school kc parang madami ng tao sa chapel so hassle..tapos yun, kala ko hindi ko na makakasabay yung bus ng zobel sa pagdating sa school kc nga 7:30 na, pero hindi, nagkamali ako, nakasabay ko, as in sabay na sabay..haha..at cyempre, ang galing galing ng timing ko kaya sobrang sabay na sabay din kami ni "ate", yey, a very good start para sa isang school day at a very good end para sa week ko..swete grabe, hindi ko akalain, talagang nagulat ako nung nakita ko cya kaya napatakbo ako sa kanya at hinug ko cya tapos hinawakan ko yung arms niya..sabi niya ng pagulat, "TIN, kamusta ka na?" hindi ako nakasagot kc nandun pa yung effect nung pagkagulat ko..wehe..tapos sabi nya. "teka, itatapon ko lang toh, tignan mo oh, nagtataho ako" tapos nagsmile ako at tumawa..tapos paakyat na kami ng stairs dun sa may gate3 cyempre, *gentlewoman* ako kaya inalalayan ko cya pataas ng stairs..haha..basta nakahawak cya sa kamay ko tapos parang tungkod nya ko na lahat ng weight nya napupunta dun sa hand na nakahawak sakin kaya mabigat pero ok lang..masaya ako kc nakatulong ako sa kanya..yehey..tapos nung nasa taas na kami ng stairs, bigla niya ko hinila tapos niyakap ng soooobrang higpit na naramdaman ko na namiss nya ko kahit papano..tapos sabi nya habang hug ako, "kamusta na tintin ko?" tapos ako naman, "ok lang po" tapos sabi nya "ok ka lang talaga ha?" tapos ako, "opo"..grabe, yung scene na yan, parang baby ang treatment nya sakin kaya nakakatuwa, tapos TINTIN KO yung cnabi nya kaya ibig sabihin property nya ko or sa kanya ako..haha..tapos sabi nya, "tignan mo oh" tapos pinatignan nya yung tiyan nya tapos sabi nya, "paglalabas na toh, iinvite kita!" tapos parang ako nakasmile lang pero deep inside tuwang tuwa na..haha..tapos sabi nya, "ang likot nya"..malikot daw c baby sa loob..sabi ko naman, "talaga? mabigat po ba?" tapos sabi nya, "oo, ang bigat at ang kulit"..wehe..tapos yun, nakatabi lang ako sa kanya at nakahawak lang cya sakin mula gate3 hanggang chapel..tapos nung nasa chapel na, sabi ko, "bye na po" tapos sabi nya, "ah, buhbye" with matching hands na nagbyebye..wehe..kulit ko noh..tapos nga pala, yung bag na dala nya ay yung bigay ko na native bag na red and flesh, tapos yung dala niyang isang mini bag ay yung bag na pinaglagyan ko nung gift ko sa kanya kaya pampadagdag saya pa..yipeee, ang saya ko talaga..
So yun!! yun yung nangyari sa araw ko na sobrang ikinasaya ko..haaay God, salamat salamat salamat po ng marami..hinding hindi ko po makakalimutan ang araw na toh na ipinadama ni "ate" ang pagkamiss at pagmamahal niya sakin..mahal na mahal ko cya..gabayan nyo po cya lagi at wag papabayaan..salamat po sa lahat at sana'y patuloy nyo kaming bigyan ng mga biyaya..mahal na mahal ko po kayo mahal na Panginoon..maraming salamat po ulit..
>>>seventeen
Kasi nung umaga, sa bahay, hassle kc late nako nakagising..so nagmamadali and stuff tapos hindi ko nanaman napatuyo yung hair ko...patay, buti nalng hindi ako nakita ni mader kundi sasabunutan nanaman nya ko..wehe..la lang..tapos yun nga, 7:20 na nandun palang kami sa may toyota..basta dun somewhere, alam nyo na yun..eh hindi ako sanay ng 7:30 dumadating sa school kc parang madami ng tao sa chapel so hassle..tapos yun, kala ko hindi ko na makakasabay yung bus ng zobel sa pagdating sa school kc nga 7:30 na, pero hindi, nagkamali ako, nakasabay ko, as in sabay na sabay..haha..at cyempre, ang galing galing ng timing ko kaya sobrang sabay na sabay din kami ni "ate", yey, a very good start para sa isang school day at a very good end para sa week ko..swete grabe, hindi ko akalain, talagang nagulat ako nung nakita ko cya kaya napatakbo ako sa kanya at hinug ko cya tapos hinawakan ko yung arms niya..sabi niya ng pagulat, "TIN, kamusta ka na?" hindi ako nakasagot kc nandun pa yung effect nung pagkagulat ko..wehe..tapos sabi nya. "teka, itatapon ko lang toh, tignan mo oh, nagtataho ako" tapos nagsmile ako at tumawa..tapos paakyat na kami ng stairs dun sa may gate3 cyempre, *gentlewoman* ako kaya inalalayan ko cya pataas ng stairs..haha..basta nakahawak cya sa kamay ko tapos parang tungkod nya ko na lahat ng weight nya napupunta dun sa hand na nakahawak sakin kaya mabigat pero ok lang..masaya ako kc nakatulong ako sa kanya..yehey..tapos nung nasa taas na kami ng stairs, bigla niya ko hinila tapos niyakap ng soooobrang higpit na naramdaman ko na namiss nya ko kahit papano..tapos sabi nya habang hug ako, "kamusta na tintin ko?" tapos ako naman, "ok lang po" tapos sabi nya "ok ka lang talaga ha?" tapos ako, "opo"..grabe, yung scene na yan, parang baby ang treatment nya sakin kaya nakakatuwa, tapos TINTIN KO yung cnabi nya kaya ibig sabihin property nya ko or sa kanya ako..haha..tapos sabi nya, "tignan mo oh" tapos pinatignan nya yung tiyan nya tapos sabi nya, "paglalabas na toh, iinvite kita!" tapos parang ako nakasmile lang pero deep inside tuwang tuwa na..haha..tapos sabi nya, "ang likot nya"..malikot daw c baby sa loob..sabi ko naman, "talaga? mabigat po ba?" tapos sabi nya, "oo, ang bigat at ang kulit"..wehe..tapos yun, nakatabi lang ako sa kanya at nakahawak lang cya sakin mula gate3 hanggang chapel..tapos nung nasa chapel na, sabi ko, "bye na po" tapos sabi nya, "ah, buhbye" with matching hands na nagbyebye..wehe..kulit ko noh..tapos nga pala, yung bag na dala nya ay yung bigay ko na native bag na red and flesh, tapos yung dala niyang isang mini bag ay yung bag na pinaglagyan ko nung gift ko sa kanya kaya pampadagdag saya pa..yipeee, ang saya ko talaga..
So yun!! yun yung nangyari sa araw ko na sobrang ikinasaya ko..haaay God, salamat salamat salamat po ng marami..hinding hindi ko po makakalimutan ang araw na toh na ipinadama ni "ate" ang pagkamiss at pagmamahal niya sakin..mahal na mahal ko cya..gabayan nyo po cya lagi at wag papabayaan..salamat po sa lahat at sana'y patuloy nyo kaming bigyan ng mga biyaya..mahal na mahal ko po kayo mahal na Panginoon..maraming salamat po ulit..
>>>seventeen
Wednesday, July 06, 2005
At Last!!!
At last, nakita ko narin si "ate"...mga ilang weeks rin bago ko ulit cya nakita..at dahil dito, ang saya saya ko..ganito, kukwento ko muna yung umaga...
nung umaga, nag chapel ako..as usual, yun naman lagi kong gnagawa eh diba? tapos tumaas ako, eh maaga pa nun, buti nalang i saw karen kaya nagsama kami, eh hindi pa cya nagchachapel kaya i went with her ulit sa chapel..nag aaral din kami for CL nung naglalakad kami kc meron kaming simultaneous LT..anyways, tapos yun, nung pataas na kami, as usual, sa stairs nanaman, nakita ko c mader...this is the first time na nagkita kami ni mader pagkatapos nyang mabasa yung email ko...kahit papano masaya naman ako sa reply nya at masaya ako na naiintindihan nya ko..yun, back to the story, nung nakita ko c mader, sobrang nagulat ako at napayakap nalang kay mader kc nga ito yung unang time na nagkita kami pagkatapos nung letter thing..yun, sabi nya good morning and asked my condition so i told her that im fine already then yun, hug then bye..naging masaya ako na napatunayan ko na talga na walang negative thing na nangyari dahil dun sa letter at masaya ako dahil hindi kami nagkahiyaan even though we said personal stuff to each other sa text at email nun ngang binigay ko yun...malaking achievement toh sa buhay ko na natapos ko na tong problema kong toh, na nasabi ko na lahat, na wala nakong tinatago sa kanya..masaya ako at nagkapaliwanagan na kami..basta ang alam ko, mahal ko c mader pero wala paring makakahigit kay "ate"..wehe!!!
next naman, nung lunch naman, pababa kami sa stairs nanaman..wehe..tapos nung nasa floor na kami ng grade7, nakita ko agad c "ate" from afar..tapos gnawa ko, hinintay ko nalang cya sa baba, nung nandun na cla, napalayo ako kc sumigaw yung mga tao, cguro kc miss na nila cna "ate"..kaya hinintay ko nalang na wala nang kumakausap sa kanya kc gusto ko cya mahug at masolo..yun, i was able to be successful naman, pumunta ako sa kanya tapos cya yung unang nag HI! tapos ako naman, hinug ko cya ng mahigpit at hinawakan ko yung tummy nya..wehe..love ko kc c baby eh..wehe..6 months na cya, 3 months nalang magiging kumpleto na ang family niya..tapos hinug nya din ako ng mahigpit..at masya ako dahil dun..hinawakan nya yung ulo ko..wala lang, tapos nung paalis na cya, hinawakan nya yung kamay ko as in holding hands*uuuyyyy PDA* wehe..joke lang, magkapatid lang na holding hands yun, wehe, tapos habang hawak nya kamay ko, nagsorry cya ng nagsorry kc di daw cya nkakatext kc nanakaw fone nya..alam nyo, yun yung gusto kong trait ni "ate" eh, yung di ko na kailangan tanungin, may kusa na cya na sabihin sakin yung information na alam niyang kailangan kong malaman..sana forever cya ganun at lalo na kung tunkol sa magiging decision nila ni kuya nes..
God, masaya po ako sa mga biyayang ibinahagi nyo sa akin at sa iba pa ngayong araw na ito, alam ko pong nandiyan lang kau at hindi nyo kami iiwanan, nagtitiwala po ako sa inyo Oh Diyos ko, alagaan nyo po kami lagi at wag pababayaan..sana'y patuloy nyo pa kaming bigyan ng mga biyayang ito, inaalay ko lahat ng aking mga gagawin para sa inyong karangalan..mahal na mahal ko po kayo Diyos ko at sana'y hindi niyo sukuan ang mga tao sa mundo tulad ko..
Hanggang dito nalang ako ngaun, sa susunod na post ko nalang..paalam..=)
>>>seventeen
nung umaga, nag chapel ako..as usual, yun naman lagi kong gnagawa eh diba? tapos tumaas ako, eh maaga pa nun, buti nalang i saw karen kaya nagsama kami, eh hindi pa cya nagchachapel kaya i went with her ulit sa chapel..nag aaral din kami for CL nung naglalakad kami kc meron kaming simultaneous LT..anyways, tapos yun, nung pataas na kami, as usual, sa stairs nanaman, nakita ko c mader...this is the first time na nagkita kami ni mader pagkatapos nyang mabasa yung email ko...kahit papano masaya naman ako sa reply nya at masaya ako na naiintindihan nya ko..yun, back to the story, nung nakita ko c mader, sobrang nagulat ako at napayakap nalang kay mader kc nga ito yung unang time na nagkita kami pagkatapos nung letter thing..yun, sabi nya good morning and asked my condition so i told her that im fine already then yun, hug then bye..naging masaya ako na napatunayan ko na talga na walang negative thing na nangyari dahil dun sa letter at masaya ako dahil hindi kami nagkahiyaan even though we said personal stuff to each other sa text at email nun ngang binigay ko yun...malaking achievement toh sa buhay ko na natapos ko na tong problema kong toh, na nasabi ko na lahat, na wala nakong tinatago sa kanya..masaya ako at nagkapaliwanagan na kami..basta ang alam ko, mahal ko c mader pero wala paring makakahigit kay "ate"..wehe!!!
next naman, nung lunch naman, pababa kami sa stairs nanaman..wehe..tapos nung nasa floor na kami ng grade7, nakita ko agad c "ate" from afar..tapos gnawa ko, hinintay ko nalang cya sa baba, nung nandun na cla, napalayo ako kc sumigaw yung mga tao, cguro kc miss na nila cna "ate"..kaya hinintay ko nalang na wala nang kumakausap sa kanya kc gusto ko cya mahug at masolo..yun, i was able to be successful naman, pumunta ako sa kanya tapos cya yung unang nag HI! tapos ako naman, hinug ko cya ng mahigpit at hinawakan ko yung tummy nya..wehe..love ko kc c baby eh..wehe..6 months na cya, 3 months nalang magiging kumpleto na ang family niya..tapos hinug nya din ako ng mahigpit..at masya ako dahil dun..hinawakan nya yung ulo ko..wala lang, tapos nung paalis na cya, hinawakan nya yung kamay ko as in holding hands*uuuyyyy PDA* wehe..joke lang, magkapatid lang na holding hands yun, wehe, tapos habang hawak nya kamay ko, nagsorry cya ng nagsorry kc di daw cya nkakatext kc nanakaw fone nya..alam nyo, yun yung gusto kong trait ni "ate" eh, yung di ko na kailangan tanungin, may kusa na cya na sabihin sakin yung information na alam niyang kailangan kong malaman..sana forever cya ganun at lalo na kung tunkol sa magiging decision nila ni kuya nes..
God, masaya po ako sa mga biyayang ibinahagi nyo sa akin at sa iba pa ngayong araw na ito, alam ko pong nandiyan lang kau at hindi nyo kami iiwanan, nagtitiwala po ako sa inyo Oh Diyos ko, alagaan nyo po kami lagi at wag pababayaan..sana'y patuloy nyo pa kaming bigyan ng mga biyayang ito, inaalay ko lahat ng aking mga gagawin para sa inyong karangalan..mahal na mahal ko po kayo Diyos ko at sana'y hindi niyo sukuan ang mga tao sa mundo tulad ko..
Hanggang dito nalang ako ngaun, sa susunod na post ko nalang..paalam..=)
>>>seventeen
Saturday, July 02, 2005
LOVE!!!!!
Finding the right person is very hard and very wrong. It is best to be the right person for the one you love and start from there. You'll always end up disappointed when you set standards and define a "right person" for you... and don't rush things coz somewhere somehow God is preparing somebody for us." Don't be in a hurry to get into a relationship because you can never find love if you insist that you are already into it. Try to find time to really understand your real feelings, to know who you really are, and what you really want in a relationship.
You're right, there's no such thing as a perfect relationship, but there's a compatible partnership that goes along with it. If you already knew that you're too big to fit into a small sized t-shirt, don't give it a try. You'll probably break it and pay for the damages you have made. If you knew and felt that the relationship will not last, don't go deeper into it.
You'll just suffer the consequences and live like hell for the rest of your life. It's really hard to say goodbye though, but you can't make it any better by just pretending you still have the same feelings. Try to let go and give yourself a chance to live life to the fullest. Give yourself a chance to grow and give your heart a much needed attention. Then you will find that you have made the right decision and you made it all by yourself. We call it love when we can't leave someone and see them crying as we try to let go. We are wrong, it's just pity. We call it love when we're too attached and think that losing the one we love will somehow make us weak and unable to face the storms of life. We misunderstood; it's just that we're too much dependent to them.
---from lara sa friendster..kinuha ko kc tinamaan ako eh, halos lahat ng nakasulat dito tama, at yung iba naman, yun yung mga dapat kong gawin at sundin pero hindi ko ginagawa kasi mahirap talagang makalimot, as in sobrang hirap lalo na kung kakagaling mo palang sa unang love relationship between you and a guy..lalo na kung INIWAN KA NG WALA MAN LANG DAHILAN!!! ang bigat bugat, ang hirap hirap at ang sakit sakit..wish ko nga makalimutan na, ilang beses ko na pinipilit pero ayaw parin, ilang beses ko na sinubukan pero wala parin..iwanan ka ba naman kc na walang reason eh, kahit tanungin mo cya ngaun, hindi ka parin nya masasagot kung ano yung dahilan..BWISET TALAGA!!! parang hindi ko tuloy alam ngaun kung minahal nga ba nya ko o hindi..pero gaya nung last sentence dun sa thingy sa taas, nararamdaman ko na ako ang nagmahal ng sobra sa kanya kaysa sa kung pano nya ko minahal kaya ibig sabihin mas marami ang nawala sa kanya and partly, nararamdaman ko na ngaun na tama ang mga kaibigan ko nung sinabi nila na it's his loss.. kasi tama nga naman na wala nang magmamahal sa kanya kung gano ko cya minahal pero meron pang iba dyan na pede kong pagbigyan ng pagmamahal na binigay ko sa kanya..
cge na, hanggang dito nalng, baka bumaha nanaman ng luha dito sa bahay eh, masyado ko nanamang iniisip..haaaay, aaaaahhhh, sana may tumulong sakin na makalimot na para hindi nako mahirapan pa..
>>>seventeen
You're right, there's no such thing as a perfect relationship, but there's a compatible partnership that goes along with it. If you already knew that you're too big to fit into a small sized t-shirt, don't give it a try. You'll probably break it and pay for the damages you have made. If you knew and felt that the relationship will not last, don't go deeper into it.
You'll just suffer the consequences and live like hell for the rest of your life. It's really hard to say goodbye though, but you can't make it any better by just pretending you still have the same feelings. Try to let go and give yourself a chance to live life to the fullest. Give yourself a chance to grow and give your heart a much needed attention. Then you will find that you have made the right decision and you made it all by yourself. We call it love when we can't leave someone and see them crying as we try to let go. We are wrong, it's just pity. We call it love when we're too attached and think that losing the one we love will somehow make us weak and unable to face the storms of life. We misunderstood; it's just that we're too much dependent to them.
We call it love when we give our whole life to them, the wholeness of us and imagined that if they leave, no one would accept us and our past.We are mistaken, its just insecurity. But no matter what the definition is, the truth still remains that love isn't something you can buy or beg. It is real and existing. You can't touch it but you can feel it in your heart. You can't find it, but it will knock before you when you least expect it to come. It can make you the happiest soul in heaven, but don't forget that it can also make you the most miserable person in the whole galaxy.
"When you lose someone... and you think you were the one who loved most, between the two of you... he lost more. For
someday you can love someone the way that you loved him but he will never be loved again the way that you did."
---from lara sa friendster..kinuha ko kc tinamaan ako eh, halos lahat ng nakasulat dito tama, at yung iba naman, yun yung mga dapat kong gawin at sundin pero hindi ko ginagawa kasi mahirap talagang makalimot, as in sobrang hirap lalo na kung kakagaling mo palang sa unang love relationship between you and a guy..lalo na kung INIWAN KA NG WALA MAN LANG DAHILAN!!! ang bigat bugat, ang hirap hirap at ang sakit sakit..wish ko nga makalimutan na, ilang beses ko na pinipilit pero ayaw parin, ilang beses ko na sinubukan pero wala parin..iwanan ka ba naman kc na walang reason eh, kahit tanungin mo cya ngaun, hindi ka parin nya masasagot kung ano yung dahilan..BWISET TALAGA!!! parang hindi ko tuloy alam ngaun kung minahal nga ba nya ko o hindi..pero gaya nung last sentence dun sa thingy sa taas, nararamdaman ko na ako ang nagmahal ng sobra sa kanya kaysa sa kung pano nya ko minahal kaya ibig sabihin mas marami ang nawala sa kanya and partly, nararamdaman ko na ngaun na tama ang mga kaibigan ko nung sinabi nila na it's his loss.. kasi tama nga naman na wala nang magmamahal sa kanya kung gano ko cya minahal pero meron pang iba dyan na pede kong pagbigyan ng pagmamahal na binigay ko sa kanya..
cge na, hanggang dito nalng, baka bumaha nanaman ng luha dito sa bahay eh, masyado ko nanamang iniisip..haaaay, aaaaahhhh, sana may tumulong sakin na makalimot na para hindi nako mahirapan pa..
>>>seventeen
